"Hi, here's my story. April 4, 2015. That's when I got my first, worst hit to the head. I played as goalkeeper in a futsal game (basically indoor soccer on a small field and hard surface). After making a save I was down on the ground, the ball was right beside my head and as the opponent tried to kick it with full force, he hit my head instead. I was unconscious for awhile, hospitalized and sent home pretty quickly. They didn't really do anything at the hospital, no MRI, nothing. I soon continued playing, and since then it's been a journey of misdiagnoses, depression, anxiety, (blackout) rage attacks, addiction, pain, loneliness, people leaving me because they couldn't face who I've become.. And the list goes on. I've now had 8 concussions total. All of them came playing futsal/soccer as goalkeeper.
I got my TBI diagnosis two years after the first hit.. I was the one who requested both MRI's and neuropsychological tests from my doctors. They didn't think it was necessary. When the tests came back, the MRI showed I had had a small internal bleeding in my brain. The neuropsychological tests showed I had big problems with both my short term memory, making up sentences etc.
I lost two years of my life thinking I'm just depressed and have bad anxiety. During those two years before the right diagnosis, I got several "wrong" ones. From depression to anxiety disorder to epilepsy etc. During that time I got hundreds of prescriptions to sedatives, strong painkillers and antidepressants. I was badly hooked on sedatives and painkillers. In the end, they only made me feel worse. I'm in neuropsychological rehabilitation, and it has saved my life. I got into school last fall to become an occupational therapist. Right now I'm on sick leave from school.
My symptoms got worse because I took on too much, too quick. Stress, death of a friend, injuring my ankle so I can't do sports right now, people I thought had my back leaving me one by one because they couldn't stand what I've become etc. all this happening pretty much at once was too much. Right now I'm on "vacation", alone. I'm basically in paradise. Still, trying to relax and enjoy myself is hard right now. I'm so overstrained right now.
My advice to all of you with TBIs; don't take on too much too quick. Whether it's school, work, relationships or working out. Sooner or later you'll relapse. I thought I was invincible, but no one is. I will come back from this. Stronger. I just need to get my head straight, rest and come up with a plan for my future. To all of you fellow TBI warriors; never give up. I sure won't. I still got my family and a few friends left who support me and believe in me. For them, I'm forever grateful." -Ville, TBI Survivor
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